By CIAN McKEOWN
Aaron Rodgers’ reputation as an aloof character has been tested this offseason. A media circus surrounding his free agency following his release from the New York Jets has drawn the ire of NFL fans for being a topic bar filler on sports shows. It didn’t help that paparazzi photos taken of Rodgers looking whistfully at the ocean on the beach outside of his Malibu home were revealed to be staged. This makes it very difficult to be on the edge of one’s seat about his destination. If we know that he loves the attention, it’s not so fun.
After the New York Giants signed free agent quarterbacks Russell Wilson and Jameis Winston and the Minnesota Vikings seemingly lost interest, it was assumed that Rodgers would sign with the Pittsburgh Steelers, the third quarterback-needy team in the running. Although this is still the assumption many clinically bored NFL media members are going with, Rodgers has been taking his time deciding.
Former Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger offered the theory on his podcast, Footbahlin, that Rodgers was still holding out for the Vikings. I’d like to offer another theory: What if Rodgers has taken one sip too many of that ayahuasca tea and doesn’t view time as linear anymore? To him, a few weeks of anal retention for Pittsburgh beat reporters feels like on flutter of a butterfly’s wing.
In the past couple of weeks, Rodgers has further teased Pittsburgh fans by taking a tour of the Steelers’ facility and throwing passes with new Steelers wide receiver D.K. Metcalf. Unfortunately for Steelers fans, the NFL world is rooting for only one result.
Over fifteen years ago, fellow Packers legend Brett Favre signed with Minnesota after a brief tenure with the Jets. Naturally, if the football gods allow us this piece of poetry, Rodgers will have gone full Favre. Normally, going full Favre is slang for something not fit to print in this newspaper, but it might be the best move for Rodgers. Pittsburgh has been stuck in football purgatory for the last several years, while the Vikings captured fourteen wins and a division title last year. Still, Rodgers has not yet revealed his true intentions.
While I realize that this must be a deep and introspective spiritual journey for him, the Steelers can only wait with bated breath much longer. The organization has already shown signs of souring on Rodgers, and there is a narrowing timeframe in which they will tolerate his indecision.
A perfect opportunity to make his announcement to the city of Pittsburgh came last Wednesday at “The Pat McAfee Show’s ‘Big Night Aht’” live show, where he was rumored to appear. Alas, the festivities came and went without an appearance from Aaron.
It is very possible that Rodgers may indeed decide to retire after all this madness, put the constraints of public life behind him, and go live in the hills somewhere. But what is for certain is that he will milk this moment for all it is worth. I would be shocked if Rodgers signs with anyone before this article is printed. If he does, may the football gods have mercy on your fanbase.
Featured image: TheSportsRush
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